Not Needing to Limit the Glut of Christmas

One of my friends wrote a post about Limiting the Glut of Christmas. She's pretty awesome; one of those amazingly open and honest, caring and sharing folks. Yeah, check her out.

We've been in the same boat, of teeter tottering between what's enough/ too much, focusing on the right things, giving (and receiving) with the right heart.

My intention this year was to do the Four Gift thing again: something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read. But we'll see what happens with that. I have not bought any presents. Not one. (well, okay, one if you count the kid tool set that I bought at a yard sale 5 months ago, and hid under my bed.) I'm usually VERY good about buying little things throughout the year, for Fred, the kids, and all of the extended family. But this year, I put those extra quarters into scrimping and saving for gas money to go on that family vacation. Totally worth it. The kids won't miss the "extra" stuff under the tree... but that family time this summer will stay in their memories.

Anyway, Fred switched jobs, after years of indecision and prayer over the issue. And, while this job is actually much better, it's a temp-to-hire position... plus they moved him to a 12-hour night shift, which totally stinks. Being a temp means we have no insurance (for the first time in our 13-year marriage!) and we get no vacation pay. So the 9 days that he is scheduled off for Christmas, is all without pay. *gasp* In case you haven't guessed, any money is going to pay our next house payment and utilities.

Now, before you worry about us poor folks not having gifts, let me assure you that we have TOO MUCH stuff. This little "cottage" is crammed with books, clothes, toys, and trinkets. I'm constantly purging. We're not going without. We're still rich, by the world's standards. For crying out loud, we have two running vehicles. Amazing, really.

The kids will also get their normal gift-time with my parents... and the other grandparents send money, so we'll pick out some gifts with that.

All this to say, being totally broke really takes the pressure off. :) I don't have to worry about getting to the stores at a certain time to get the "magical gift" that will make Christmas a success. There's no debate about how much is too much, because we know we'll get a little of what we can, and that's enough. More importantly, the kids know that. They don't make Christmas lists. They don't ask for things (in part, probably because we don't watch TV, therefore they don't see commercials. Ah, the power of movies over shows!)

Best of all, I'm spending less time worrying, wrapping, spending, planning... and more time being with them. More time thinking about the Real Reason. More time being thankful for what we already have. More energy into celebrating Advent, than teetering on the commercialism that surrounds Christmas.

We have years of abundance, and that is nice. We do buy gifts for the kids, and extended family and friends, when it's possible. But it's nice to relax and be okay with the lean years, too. Rejoice in every circumstance, right? And, somehow, even though this seems like such a risky time for us, I feel very at peace with it. I can only assume this is a supernatural peace, as I'm usually a rather anxious person. ;)

How do you handle the glut? Is the balance hard for you? Are you having a year of abundance, with full grain stores, or a lean year?

Accidents, in 3s

Thursday- attempted to move heavy furniture by myself and fell, right as my 3-year old accidentally knocked the room divider over, on top of me. If my feet had been grounded, I could have braced myself and caught it. Unfortunately, I was already going down, and it hit me hard, smashing my right arm, and ripping the fingernail off of my ring finger. Actually, it split the nail in half, and ripped the side clear off, leaving a jagged dangling edge. Yeah, it was bad. I screamed, cried, vomited. Bad, bad, bad. Lots of pain meds, and some deep breathing, and I managed to regain composure. Didn't sleep well that night, though.

By Friday I was functioning, with a finger brace. Went to the Right Choices Corn Maze with Fred and the kids, my sister and her kids, Papaw, and about 100 other folks from our homeschool group. It was great, great fun!
Corn Maze, Cow Train, Hay Bale Jumping, Hay House, Drain Slides, Hayride, farm animals to pet, and nice picnic areas all around.

We bought some mini-pumpkins and gourds, and a large one to carve. NatureMan decided that he really really wanted his mini-pumpkin carved into a "monster pumpkin." Being the awesome Mom that I am, I grabbed a knife and attempted to carve out the design he had drawn. Of course, my grip wasn't great, seeing as how I had the finger brace on. So, my knife slipped and I slashed the middle finger of my left hand. Ow. It won't need stitches, but it's sore and bandaged.

So, this morning, I decided to do some safer things, like yard saling. TheArtist Child and I left the house at 7am...

and got into a fender bender.

Like, immediately. (sigh)

If bad things really happen in 3s, then I should be totally done now, for at least for awhile!

We had great luck at a friend's preschool yard sale... puppet show curtain for $2, huge costume tub with drawers (that included a chef hat and two aprons, two full body boy outfits, etc) for $1, black leather game chair for $2, firetruck rug 50 cents. Can't beat these prices! I'm all about yard saling or thrift store shopping. No sense in paying 10x as much for the exact same thing, at the mall!

So, anyway, typing is a bit hard. Drawing and painting is, too, but I'm up for the challenge. I've always held my pen/pencil on my ring finger, which is impossible for me now. We'll see how it affects my art. ;)

Hope your weekend has been SAFE and fun!

I have about a thousand activities to catch you up on. Plus, I rearranged the playroom, rewrote the chore charts, and let my art center explode with color. Stay tuned. :)

Material World

Here I am. This is me. This is me purging.

Ladies and Gents, that was my first round of getting rid of excess clothes. It's ridiculous.

Why Oh Why do I have so much STUFF? It's overwhelming me. I spend a ridiculous amount of time doing laundry, picking up the house, having the kids clean their rooms. And lately I've just been wishing for sparsity. I'm envisioning a home with two chairs in the living room, with a round table nearby to set my glass of tea. I could do without the TV.

I picture a playroom with a few special toys, stocked bookcases, a couple of meaningful stuffed animals (like the Teddy that my Nature Boy slept with every night for 6 years)...not piles upon piles of rarely-played with cars and trucks, puppets and legos, etc. Why do I keep things that we rarely use? Why do I buy more, when I have so much? The stuff is worthless, unless we're using it.

In fact, worse than worthless, because once we've accumulated a certain amount of stuff, it starts to own us rather than the other way around. The house has to be big enough for the stuff. We have to have enough storage for the stuff. Enough time to care for the stuff.

Enough already. No more stuff!!!

Really, a house full of stuff can be very depressing. A cluttered room saps my spirits.

Now, I'm certainly not saying that I've overcome my ways. We Americans are used to our Stuff. We love our Stuff. We buy more and more Stuff, especially if it's a bargain. Or the neighbor/ friend/ co-worker has it. Gotta keep up with the crowd, right?

No, I'm not free from it. But I see it. And I want to be free.

Money IS for spending. But we spend and spend until we're enslaved to our possesions, those good deals, and the time to maintain it.

Now, I do enjoy clothes. It's a weakness for me.

I see style as a great way to express who I am and what I like. It's an art form.

Still, I had too much. And I'm trying to fix that.

I have too much home decor. Too many kitchen gadgets. When was the last time I used that popcorn popper? Have I ever needed three muffin tins at the same time? Maybe once. And I could have borrowed an extra.

I keep things for the "what-if"s and the "potential."

But, friends, this is me.

This is me, turning over a new leaf. I'm purging. I want less. I want only what we use regularly. I want to feel FREE from the stuff.

I want the time and energy to focus on the important things. I'll keep the Stuff that helps me towards that goal (art supplies, books for my kids...) but the random extra stuff just has to go!

So, who needs something? Maybe I have one you could come get. Doesn't hurt to ask.

Happy Days are here to stay

The kids wondered why we aren't flying. Well, simply put, it's because we're poor.

But, you know, I'm okay with that. I'm okay with driving. I'm okay with bypassing amusement parks or ocean tours, in favor if downtime at the coast every day. I'm more than okay with this amazing opportunity we have to travel together. Being on the low-end of the financial pool keeps us creative! Sure, I would fly if we had the money-- but we don't, and that's fine. You use what you've got.

I grew up at the high-end of middle class...but I don't remember "things." I can't recall a single Christmas gift I received as a child. I barely remember Disney World. The things that stuck with me were family game nights, weekend camping trips, the super-long stocked art table that my parents had set up for us. I remember long walks by the creek, "special times" with my Dad, and creek swimming (My parents swam with us; they never stayed on the shore the entire time, reading or tanning.) I remember all the TIME we had together. And that is what I want my kids to remember. :-D

Peace through the storm

Do you ever have weeks that feel more like a television show than real life? So much has happened, and so quickly, that it's hard to absorb. So, until now, I've chosen to let the blog be my "happy place," and leave the worries behind.

First, good news. My sister's surgery was a complete success. They removed the entire right kidney, and the cancer along with it. She had a mostly good hospital stay: wonderful staff and care, but a scary time when the epidural wore off and the pain hit hard and unexpectedly. Oral pain meds and oxygen did the trick to right the problem. Still, I know that must have scared her.

Overall, it went excellently.

Now some bad news. Julie and I went up there on Tuesday night to visit and bring Amy and Vu some PF Chang's food. Julie and I ordered Mongolian beef to share. Mongolian beef. Mongolian beef. I had to repeat that all night. We started eating... and Julie choked. I kid you not. She choked on beef while visiting someone in the hospital. What are the chances? She could breathe, but couldn't swallow. Anything. Even spit, She vomited repeatedly, but that did no good. The doctors sent us down to the 2nd floor ER. Two little sisters in the hospital at the same time: one for cancer surgery and the other choking. Yeah, it was quite the night. Poor Amy had no idea what was going on down in the ER. After almost two hours, IVs, anti-nausea meds, X-rays, and a call to the gastrointestinologist, Julie finally dislodged the food and we went on our merry way. Yeah. No more beef for you, Julie. (Should have been in a Friends episode, right??)

Okay, more good news. Tell me when you start feeling sick on this roller coaster.

Yesterday Amy was released from the hospital. Yay! Most importantly, her pathology reports are all back: no more cancer!! All of her symptoms should be gone now, and life will resume as normal when she has fully recovered. It should take about two months to heal and regain strength. Another praise: her husband will be home, with paid leave, for the entire two months to take care of their adorable fat baby.

Some very bad news: my aunt just found out that her breast cancer has spread to the lymph nodes and bones. Christine and her family need prayer please.

More big bad news. A few days ago, we got word that my Mimi's CT scans were not at all good. Her pancreatic cancer has now spread to her liver, lungs, pelvic region, and has significantly intensified around the bowel area. She must be in pain. I pray every night that she won't suffer. I just can't imagine fighting such a horrible disease. I wish I could hug her and stay with her, and shield her from any kind of pain.Yet, through it all, her voice is soft and kind. A nurse of hers wrote yesterday and told me, "she looked so beatuiful. The peace that radiates around her comes from the Lord I know."

Some other not-nearly-as-bad-in-relation-news: car troubles for everyone in my family. My sister's car went out and she had to pay quite the hefty fee to get it back. And now the transmission on her other car is going out. Yeah. Then my Dad's truck died. And then my van. We'll be paying several hundred dollars to pick it up today. Sigh. In the grand scheme of things, this so-does-not-matter. Not in the light of cancer.

Good news: I feel shielded. Yes, I've cried. I did get lost driving the other day, just cruising along, deep in thought and then I "woke up" and had no clue where I was. Life has been consuming. Sometimes I can sail along, happily and smoothly, just enjoying the scenery. But the last few weeks have been different, rocky, fraught with danger. But yet we are shielded. Somehow. I can't even explain that but to say I know I'm being prayed for. I know my own grandparents, struggling with cancer and the pain of impending separation, are still praying for me. And their prayers are being answered with the gift of peace. I've never before cried like this, and yet still felt such peace.

(and my italics are stuck, so just go with it...)

There have been days lately when I catch myself having "too much fun," enjoying life too much, smiling and laughing... and I think, "wait, people are suffering. People are hurting. I shouldn't be so happy right now. I should be crying. How am I even supposed to feel??"

I don't know.

I could ask if it's okay to have peace right now. Okay to be happy in my day-to-day craftiness and schooling, using my blog as a haven. But I already know the answer is yes, even if it feels unnatural. I cry, but I'm protected. Even the financial aspects feel "okay." I wondered today if we were being kept off the road with the kids for some reason. And then I prayed and thanked God, if that was the case. His ways are higher than mine. I'll do my best, but I'm trying not to question the things completely out of my control.

This is a haven at times, and will continue to be such, but it's also a great way to reach out. I ask you to please keep my sisters in prayer. Both of them, as Julie seems to be very prone to freak accidents. ;-) By golly, she never should have gone sky-diving. Could have ended very badly.

Please pray for my aunt Christine, her daughter Rachelle, and the rest of the family. Please pray for my Mimi. That whatever time she has left will be as pain free as possible, and that she will feel so loved, and at peace. And please pray for my Papaw as he takes care of her very day. This is the greatest trial of their lives.

In more good news, today is my 12th anniversary to a fabulous, funny, laid-back and handsome man. He is my best friend. He has stuck with me through it all. And I love him so much.

Honey, SHMILY!!! (See how much I love you...)

Explore the New Shop!

In case you didn't notice the mini-shop on the right, LOOK. :-) Yep, I went and took the plunge. I'm now an Etsy shop owner.

To answer the first likely question: the beautiful model is my sister.

In anticipation of the next question: When do I get time to sew? Generally when I should be sleeping instead. Or during quiet afternoon time.

I need to create. Actually, I feel this tug more often than I recognize hunger pangs.

Enjoy. Buy. Get inspired. :-)

workety work and Monster Gloves

This has been an unusual weekend. Fred started a second job, working 10-12 hours (plus the hour round trip drive) on Saturday and Sunday.

And I've realized that I'm spoiled.

Very.

My dear husband always lets me sleep in on weekends. And he always helps me bathe the kids. And reads to them and helps me put them to bed. He gets the drinks ready for dinner. And has the kids clear their plates.

Now I'm on my own for the weekends. It's brutal. (Actually, it's not that bad, I just miss my man!!)

The kids miss Daddy terribly, but he explained to them that one of us needs to bring in some extra income right now, and he wants it to be him. Gotta admire that. He doesn't mind me working, if I want to, but he doesn't want it to be out of necessity.

So, anyway, the kids and I have been doing some extra post-Halloween crafts. Monster gloves:

Wendy and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I went to sleep in a warm dry bed and woke up on wet sheets with a toddler next to me. I tripped on my husband's size 13 ski-like shoes when I scrambled out of bed. I fell on a dinosaur. I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

At breakfast, the three big kids ate their food, but the baby threw his off of the highchair. A fly landed in my coffee. And I ran out of root beer.

I think I'll move to Blueberry Land.

At VBS drop-off only one child who was old enough would stay. LiveWire wanted to stay, but he isn't old enough. Dang. I had to drag him out of there. I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

The kids fought. The trash leaked. The milk spilled. And there were...ahem...female issues.

LittleLad pulled all the books from the bookcase. Again. And again. Littlelad broke my candle holder. Littlelad knocked the movies down. And Littlelad screamed when I took him out of his highchair. What's up with that? Littlelad is the easy one!

I think I'll move to Blueberry Land. Babies are always happy there, I've heard.

My CD drive won't eject. My car is squealing. Again. My friend is sad. My other friend is out of work. My other friend is angry (not at me, thankfully.) And another friend is in dire need of help. Yeah...you guessed it...I could tell this was gonna be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

And my wonderful husband. Well, he's even getting on my nerves. New position at work. Better position, but I know there's pressure. I'll forgive the...buggerishness of this evening. (What, that's not a word?)

But, you know, some days are just like this. And it could be worse. Much worse.
Even in Blueberry Land.

I'm prepared for tomorrow! New game plan in place. I'm ready to start a new day. Thank You, God, for new days. The sun sets and it comes back up, fresh and ringing with promise.

Tomorrow TWO kids will go to VBS. And one toddler will get "special time" during Littlelad's nap. And Littlelad will be banned from all bookcases. And he will be happy anyway, because we'll play pat-a-cake and he loves pat-a-cake. (So do I!) The big kids won't fight (prayer item here!) and the van won't squeak (I'll drive reeeallly slow.) I'm hoping for A Terrific, Happy, Very Good, Positive Day. :-)

PS Almost forgot two of the GOOD things that happened today. We had ALL debt paid off (except the house) but medical stuff always sneaks up on us. Usually because insurance glitches something up and we end up owing more than they first said we would be required to pay. But...annnyway, I paid off our only debt...a small medical debt and now it's gone. Woo-hoo.

I also met Shan in person!!! At VBS! And, being the dork I am, I didn't realize who on earth it was until about mid-way into our conversation, and at that point I didn't think I should jump up and down and say "IT's YOU!!" because I had...ummm...already kinda pretended to know who on earth I was talking to, and I thought the sudden realization would throw her off a bit. Like I said, this day was just kinda off for me!

Shan, it was nice to meet you!! Tomorrow I'll act more friendly, now that I know who you are. :-)

Oh, and thanks for saying I'm taller than you expected. I'd like to be tall. I wear heels A LOT.

The Secret to a Lasting Marriage

"One of the people has to be sane, and the other one is only allowed to be insane occasionally. We take turns on who gets to be which person."

-Actor Christopher Meloni

Fred was the sane one yesterday. And today. Do I have to take turns???

Seriously, though, I feel like I've been under oppression lately. Too many things crowding in at once. Instead of being my normal energetic and rather cheerful self (right??), I've become a mess of blubbering curls.

So what do I do with this new development? Pray? Read my Bible? Cry? Call friends? Well, all of the above, but not in the right order. I'll let you in on my not-so-successful coping strategy: I bawl. Yep, I just sit somewhere and eat cookies and bawl my eyes out. Great, huh? I like to cook when I'm anxious, so there are plenty of breads and desserts abounding right now.

*edited*
Some people offer wonderful advice. Some people think they offer wonderful advice...it's well-meaning, but totally the WRONG thing to say!! I had one of those conversations today. So I called someone else, naturally (actually my Mimi, to pray, and then a friend to come over.) Thank the Dear Lord for friends when you need them. This dear friend drove right over and helped, while I took a time out with the Bible.

And you know what? THAT helped. Duh. So why don't I do that immediately?? WHY? I can't claim the new-Christian-syndrome, because I don't even remember when I was saved. Why do I wait so long to run to my Father's arms? Possibly because I feel foolish crying over such little things when there are so many BIG things that other people deal with. You know, who am I to disturb God, right? Sounds foolish. I tell my kids just the opposite all the time, but then I wait and wait and wait before I work up the courage to knock on that door.

I have two verses on my computer desk: 1 John 5:14 "Now this is confidence we have before Him: whenever we ask anything according to His will, He hears us."
and Psalm 144:2,3 "He is my loving ally and my fortress, my tower of safety, my deliverer. He stands before me as a shield, and I take refuge in him. He subdues the nations under me."

I can believe that. I do believe that. Yet I crumble so easily. Argh.

So, I'm setting some goals, and putting them out here for all to see. Why? Because, like Adelia, I believe that sharing your goals with people you love will help you achieve what you desire. I need prayer, encouragement.
First, I need to stop worrying. I know this isn't easily gauged, and everyone worries to a certain extent. But, specifically, I need to release the worry over things of which I have no control. That does no good.

Second, I need to redeem my time. A line in a book last night suddenly struck me: "A person rescues what he loves." Yes, how obvious. But, really, I tend to let the most important things in my life slide while I take care of "everything else." I need to rescue what I love. I need to focus.

Third (and this is directly related to every other goal), I need to get back on a schedule. How can I redeem my time and reduce my worry if I don't have a game plan? I'm overwhelmed. I need my structure back. Right now I feel like I've lost it from every area: church life, finances, homeschool, housework, you name it. Everything has slid away from me. My darling little sister is helping me work on my Home Keeping Binder, which I plan to put into effect on Thursday. Pray on Thursday. ;-) I know it won't be --KABOOM-- change, but that is the start of my implementation!

Fourth, dang I'm tired. I forgot. Oh, yeah!! I need more sleep. I just *think* that I can get away with 5 or so hours of sleep, but I'm not doing so hot apparently. So I'm setting a curfew. And I'm planning to get up earlier than the kids (no small feat), and have my Bible time ALONE. The kids can read in bed until 7am.

Okay, enough for now. Bible time in bed. I need it.

PS Am I stressing anyone out lately? Didn't someone recently comment about me being upbeat or something? Yeah. Sorry about this, guys. "And this too shall pass."

Financial Peace: paying off debt!

Woo-Hoo Friday!! I just paid off our car.

And the dentist.

And now...

NOW we owe NOTHING BUT THE HOUSE!!!

Sing with me. Dance for joy with me. Praise God with me. Yes, I am happy, happy, happy. :-)

Fred and I have never had a credit card or finance account.

That's right, people, we've gone against the tide.

No plastic here for us. We don't view it as a necessary evil...just an evil.

We've had so many "emergencies" that would have required money.

And, yes, we've over drafted and gotten in medical debt before. But we always made it, by the grace of God. We did have family help at times. I know that not everyone has that. I know there are cases where you have to just do what you have to do, and I'm not condemning anyone for their plastic use. :-) I'm just thankful that God has led us on a path that didn't require it.
I'm SOOO thankful for being out of debt.

Prov 22:7b "... the borrower is servant to the lender."

I got sick of being the servant to the lender!!
And now we have decided to praise God!!!-- and reward our family for this monumental achievement. We just bought a playground!! (And I got a great deal, by the way!) I'm putting it together myself, so please pray for me.

The only other thing like this that I've attempted is building the shed, with October's help. My poor husband...don't give the man a hammer. His Dad came over one day and they tried to help. (sigh) October and I had to go back and redo all of their work. They thought that if the pieces didn't fit right, they could just MAKE them fit, and drill holes in different spots. Yeah. It doesn't work that way. We lost hours of work, but it was worth it to see him so intent on *trying* to help me. Heh heh.
Anyway, I'm excited. Today will be a good day. My New Year's Resolution was to

Be Intentional.

And I'm trying to stick by that. Now we have debt paid, money in savings, we'll buy a new mower, and hubby is looking for a new job.
(Wow, I went to tag this, and didn't realize that I've never used a money, debt, or financial tag before. Obviously I don't dwell much on it! Matt 6:27 "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" )

I want to live my life constantly aware of the adundance that God provides for us!